Are you surrounding yourself with the right friends? We’re all constantly inundated with so much. We all have certain individuals who make us feel like superheroes. They’re supportive, they see the best in you, and they make you feel invincible!
We also have people who we can feel insecure around. These are the types that make you feel “less than”. They are the ones who tell you your dreams are too big or unattainable. They engage in passive aggressive sabotage and we can become so codependent that we don’t even notice it.
Remember, you’re the one in charge.
Ultimately, YOU are the one most responsible for your current feelings, moods, and beliefs. You have a duty to yourself and those around you to constantly work on growing as a person and becoming the best and most evolved person you can be.
The world doesn’t owe us anything. We are all on our own paths and whether we choose to grow or remain stagnant is largely up to us.
Still, environment plays a role. Since we aren’t ALWAYS strong ALL of the time, we can be vulnerable. These are the times when negativity can seep in and wreak havoc on our psyches. When seasons of doubt and days of despair creep up, which they inevitably do, the last thing we need to hear is someone reinforcing it.
When we want to take a chance and we aren’t sure about the outcome, but we believe in the dream, we need people in our corner rooting us on and propping us up when we’re weak.
What should our friends contribute to our lives?
A good friend is not someone who always tells you what you want to hear. He or she is someone who has your best interests at heart and tells you the truth.
I had a really interesting conversation this weekend in which a good friend of mine randomly told me he used to be “afraid of me.” I was caught off guard by this admission and asked for a little more clarification. He said that it was because I was always honest with him. Sometimes, there were things he didn’t want to face or things he did wrong that he didn’t want to take responsibility for and he knew I was not going to sugar coat anything if he asked my opinion. I believe that is what a true friend is for. Admittedly, that may be why I don’t have a huge circle of friends! I choose quality over quantity.
The friends that are in my life, I know that I can count on completely. They tell me when I am right and they tell me when I am wrong. But, it is always out of love and for what they believe to be my best interest.
It’s better to have a few solid people in your corner than 100 people who just tell you what you want to hear. Sometimes, we all need the guidance and if a person is just mirroring and walking on eggshells, then what use is he or she on our journey towards growth?
So, what do I do if I don’t have QUALITY friends in my life?
You don’t need to start cutting people out of your life right away, unless they’re very obviously toxic. If you start to be the type of friend who can be straightforward and supportive, even in hard times, like-minded individuals will be the ones who remain in your life. You’ll start to attract more and more people who want the best for you, love you and love you so much that they’ll tell you some hard truths you would rather not hear. The “Magnets” podcast discusses this concept in further detail.
Your vibe attracts your tribe.
Never stop the work of becoming the best version of yourself that you can be. This includes:
- Listening to positive talks
- Reading the right material &
- Surrounding yourself with the right friends
YOU have to set yourself up for success.
It’s your responsibility to set yourself up for success – nobody is going to do it for you. Even with that truth, we aren’t going to be superheroes every day. There will be days that you need to talk to the right person, read or listen to the right thing, spend an extra 20 minutes in meditation, whatever it is.
Make sure that on those days, you don’t have the people around you who pull you further down the wrong path. Attitudes and beliefs can be contagious. Just like we wash our hands and try to avoid colds, keep yourself healthy by surrounding yourself with the right people and things!
You are in charge of your life. You decide your destiny.